She portrays the Lilith, in her darkness and endeavors. A feminine and shapeless black fog dissolves into a striking similarity of her countenance. Beauty and danger evolve into a sticky tar, which spreads into my dreams. I can't escape the grasp of a nightmare's Queen.
I am frozen in fear as this energy rips a newborn baby from my arms. The baby is crying, as it was just lying in bed sleeping beside me, when it occurred. It is covered in a pale pink felt like blanket. This is odd, considering I have no daughter. Yet, in the moment, it makes sense.
I take out my arms in a wide hold around the substance and two arms start to show. The blob shapes hands, which lay upon the infant as we fight for its well-being. A form of long wild hair begins to fall down as it becomes frenzied. I would not let go.
It speaks in a coarse woman's voice, saying: "Try to scream, I bet that you can't." So, I do but, my voice is not working. My body is becoming paralyzed as well in horror. I try to fling myself towards the wall but, I am no longer functioning. Instead, I focus all my brainpower to release the endorphins I need to win and make one final swing towards it's essence. I am successful as I gain the target into my possession.
As soon as I win in the match against this avenger, I notice that it speeds off quickly from where it came. It had to be only a few seconds, at an inhuman pace, that it was racing. I wonder where it was going and how it came to be but, I cannot know for certain.
There is a house which is stable, yet vintage. It is made predominantly of wood and plaster. There are arches in the corner of white paint, of curvy swirls, going horizontal. There are small flecks of paint, coming off in patches, yet the structure is strong.
I am on the third floor of the mansion. It has black hardwood floors and large wide bay view windows. The sun is set and only the starlight is pouring into the room. There are no clouds either. It is a mysterious and beautiful disposition.
There is a group of little girls, sitting around a large pinewood table. It is highly glossed and Christmas decorations sit all about it. There are red burgundy placemats and candelabras scattered here and there. They are made of gold and silver alternating patterns.
These little girls are wearing long cotton dresses, of a thick mixture. They are pleated at the bottom. The fabrics have patterns of heavy winter floral and wood scenes. They have ribbons in their hair and fancy shoes, which glitz and glitter.
I am as a young girl too but, I am across the room on the floor. I wear a deep purple velvet dress with black embroidering swirls on the front. My hair is shoulder length. A huge male black widow spider runs through and I step on it with my right silver shoe.
It is so large that it is about the length and width of my shoe. There is blood all over, like a human would bleed, not an animal. I grab it off my shoe to throw it out. No one is even paying attention to me. The other girls have fair hair and eyes and the parents are there with them. My parents seem to be missing.
The adults shuffle us out of the room to bedrooms. Mine is by a high window and I can see outside from it. They hook wires and tiny lamps up to our skin because they say that it keeps us young forever. The one lady said that she wouldn't want us growing up. She also explains that I am 76 years old, even though I look small.
As soon as she leaves the area, I take the wires and lights off of my skin. I crawl out of bed to the door and see if I can spot an exit. There are a lot of nurses about the area and they are very busy. They are wearing white nurse's uniforms from the older days. They have short curly bobs and white loafers with tights, as well.
At this point, I am very sleepy and so in fact, I just walk back to the bed. I look out the window at the vast nothingness and wonder where I could go. I wonder who I could be, could have been and am going to be. I let myself dream.
It is so dark that I can barely see but, I can feel. I can sense the sweat on my face and the fresh air. I am outside like at The Great Horror Campout. This is a place where I was a scare actress, as a serial killer and I would frighten people with a baseball bat that liked that sort of thing.
There was a chain link fence on the one side, to keep the people from going out on the exit, the wrong way. It was like a tunnel, so that they couldn't get lost. It was a mobile one, so you could swing it whatever way you wanted.
Well, I was dreaming that it was set up, all the way to a long stretch, so that I ran all the way to the end and there it was. It went into an alley that was different from the field I was in. So, I jumped up and climbed over it and ran down that street until I saw myself disappear.
There is a busy street in the daylight that I am walking down. There are people of all ethnicities and religions on the sidewalks. They stop and make small talk with me as I go. They are very kind and thoughtful.
The area is heavily trafficked and there is many trees looming overhead. They are of many different varieties, such as cherry, apple and pine, much like where I live in Elk Grove, CA. It brings the birds about, chirping loudly as I go.
A detective with a pale face and huge muscles begins to walk fast from behind me. It scares me at first because he seems as a random person. He is in all black and he is making an extra effort to catch up to me. He grabs my shoulder and shows me an F.B.I. badge so, I stop and talk to him.
He asks me all sorts of questions about a man that was murdered. I had never heard of or seen this person before so, I was quite perplexed as he seemed to be so sure that I had known him. I politely answer all of his questions and he still seems very sure that I am a part of some murder plot which disturbs me very deeply.
He can't arrest me or anything so he says farewell to me and I keep walking on. A large city bus passes by and the people inside all look out at me, as I am a source of entertainment from where they are standing. They look at me in wonderment and curiosity.
I walk underneath of an olive tree and I look up and admire the beauty. It is very lush and green and brings so much joy to my mind. I reach up, as high as possible and break a large piece of its branch off and smell it and carry it with me, as I turn around to walk back the direction that I came.
I am at a very grand piano and I am playing the notes on it. It is a classic one with a black gloss and ivory keys. The piano bench matches the musical instrument. I sit upon it in casual clothes, blue jeans and a white t-shirt.
I am just playing it as if I am a master and the notes are coming out of me perfectly. I am playing with both hands and singing as well about a beautiful place that has a never ending ocean and mountains. Everything comes out in an enchanting melody.
In the end of the song, I hit one final key on the left side and I fade out slowly as if I am a spirit, watching myself. It is angelic and mesmerizing and fills me with great peace. It is as if I was never as happy as this.
There is an office space in a building with florescent lighting. The air is stale and hot. There is tan metal furniture about everywhere. I go over to a cluttered desk because I see my father, wearing a bright red shirt and blue jeans, just standing there.
He pulls a picture off of the wall that the desk is pushed against. It has many framed documents and photos. He shows me the picture, which is of my step mother's back and she is sitting, covered in a sky blue drape around her bottom half and looking to the left. He doesn't say a word.
In my mind, I can feel the sense that it means that she is going to turn her back on me but, I cannot be sure. He places the picture back on the wall and then he sits in the desk chair, folds his hands in his lap and just stares. He has an air of decisiveness about him.
There is a house that is painted with white paint all over the rooms. The spaces are small and short. The air feels cool and crisp, as if there is cement and poor circulation. The moisture in the air rots some parts of the paint on the walls.
I find myself inside of a bedroom. There is a short carpet, which is cool to the touch of my bare feet. It is gray in color and smells very fresh. I go to the closet and open the sliding doors, as Travis Barker enters the room.
He is wearing a black t-shirt with grey words on it, in a square format. He has on navy jeans with a chain on the side of his pants. He has short dark hair and it is laid back with gel. He goes into the room with confidence and goes toward the closet.
He pulls out band posters and all of my old Blink-182 memorabilia and hands it to me. He says that it is very cool. He grabs some push pins and makes a smiling face design with x's as eyes and pins it on the wall and then he leaves.
It is a bittersweet meeting, as their music means so much to me and it always will. He represents my youth and love for music. This is part of the reason that I was inspired to play guitar. They are my idols forever.
I find myself wearing all white jumpsuit uniform, of a heavy cotton, collared neck piece and black heavy duty boots. My hair is long and untied, brunette and straight. I am standing next to a man with brown hair and a long beard. He wears black square framed glasses, a plaid shirt and blue jeans with white sneakers.
I point to the small space around us. There are cutout boxes in the wall. They resemble built in furniture, maybe shelves, for placing trinkets or decor. I have plastic shielded over most of the room but, the pieces which are uncovered are easy to tell apart.
The paint of most the space is pure white but, within the cubicles is paint of every color that can be imagined. Each stroke is made wide and short, in no particular order or logic. There is a brown yellow on top of brown and blue over the red, creating a purple which blends into black and more, suggesting another dimension exists.
We sit back and stare at the cubicles in wonderment and meditate on the vision before us. We speak about placing silver metal sculptures around this, but we really are not sure. We also talk of getting fresh pink flowers, to fill up the voids. We sit in silence for a bit.
The other man turns around to leave and waves goodbye in a generous manner. I turn back around to the spaces and grab a paintbrush with a cobalt blue handle and place it in a palette of other colors. I keep on in this manner, painting lines in another space. It is a relaxing trance I fall into which heals me spiritually, yet it does not mean anything in order or reason.
It is a dark night and I am in camo pants and a black tank top. My hair is in a long ponytail, even though that's against the dress code. I am walking around the perimeters of the abandoned house. It appears to be from modern times. The outside is painted a pale blue and the lawn is moist, crisp and fresh. There is a small amount of light from the outside porch.
There are other people there with me. They are younger and male. They are on other sides of the building as well, looking around the corners, holding black pistol guns. They look at me and that is my cue to start walking towards the target. So, I advance on slowly.
The target is a ghost in a brown uniform with a forest green shirt and a beret hat on his head. He looks like he is virtual, because he is glitching as a screen would. He stands by a machine that is like a huge water bubble with an alarm with digits on the front of it. It is massive and impressive.
He wanders away by floating as he doesn't seem to be noticing us. So, we approach the machine and we push the buttons and the water inside begins to move around and the numbers change and make electrical sparks. I can see dates and times flickering on the machine and that's the last thing I can remember.
There is a concrete building somewhere that I am residing in. It looks like a hospital mortuary or something because the lighting is low and neon lights and dim bulbs glow in an industrial setting. There are metal cots all around and many different rooms. I am wearing a white uniform like scrubs and no shoes.
All of the rooms are made in cement. The walls, floors and ceiling are all soft and smooth. There are no carpets or wood, anywhere to be found. The air is cool and moist at the same time. There is not a lot of noise, only the faint sound of low voices and carts rolling with footsteps falling too.
I walk into one of the rooms, which has a low ceiling and metal double doors, which have small narrow windows in the center, with wire, made to enclose and protect. There is a large metal sink with two faucets, which are tall, and bend down with a large spray nozzle. The area is deep and empty. The material shines in the light of two humming fluorescent bulbs, which span a distance of about six feet across.
To the left of this area, there is three metal carts, piled very high, almost reaching the top of the room. They each glisten from being so clean and sparkle by the nearby lighting. They are each filled with fruits such as oranges, blueberries, grapes, strawberries and lemons overflowing in abundance. There are also white cupcakes with mounds of buttercream frosting, swirling up into the sky very tall.
It is so hard to see completely in here because many corners are still dark and there is no opportunity for sunlight to come through here. I sit at a metal cafeteria picnic table and eat one of the cupcakes, sprinkled in oversized blueberries. I am so happy to be eating it and it feels me with a lot of peace and joy.
I find myself in a house. The space is plain and unmoving. The walls are all white and the floors are a light pine color. There is furniture about, as it is built into the home of the same materials and boring shapes.
I have black long hair and I am wearing a white outfit, consisting of a blouse and pleated skirt. I am walking through to the back of the main room, past a hallway, to get to a bathroom. I see it has a gorgeous square mirror with silver vines about it inside.
After I come back out, I notice that there is a black shadow figure in the hallway, which won't let me pass by. He builds himself up in layers of energy and speaks in a man's angry voice to intimidate me, so that I cannot pass. He says that he does not want me to leave and wants to control me.
I go into the bedroom because it is right before his gate. The floor is covered by a gray circular woven rug and there is a glass table in the center. I sit on the bed, which has light blue blankets and white pillows and hover over the area.
I go into my smart phone and try to instant message people that I know for some help. Each time that I hit the emoji or sticker button, it falls out of the bottom of the phone and comes alive. They become large, about the size of a watermelon. They each bounce away making strange high pitched noises of excitement.
The devil in the hallway calls them over by his side and they listen to everything he says. He shrinks back down to size and resembles a man beast with large horns protruding from each side of his face. He is still only a silhouette of darkness.
As he is in the middle of all the commotion, I break free and run back to the other side of the house. There is Paul, waiting for me there and he has holy water and incense. We start to pray to angels and it doesn't seem to work. So, we leave and come back one more time.
When we come back again, we bring more incense and water to pray. I almost give up hope to say we should try praying with a cross to Jesus instead of this universal way and then the monster and all the minions disappear right before I could even suggest it. It seems that I shouldn't give up hope.
I am in a building with a gym. I am a bit younger because I am with high school girls at tryouts for cheerleading. It is no one that was ever on my team in waking life. They look similar to them though. They are all happy and excited.
I want to make the squad so bad that I am infatuated with it. We have one day where we practice drills and choreography and then we have a break. The other girls go off together and I am told by the coach to go to the doctors.
I walk from the gym through a side door. There is a parking lot, just like at my old high school, which is made of asphalt. Across from it, there is a green lawn, which leads up to a small trailer. I cross this to reach my destination.
The trailer is a doctor's office and I knock to go inside. I think it’s for an athlete physical because I am not feeling any sickness or pain. The man at the front desk asks me to sit in one of the various blue chairs, which sit against the wall, by the door. He wears black jeans and a black and white plaid shirt. There is also a large window behind the seats, which is covered with plastic blinds, so that small slits of light come through.
I sit down and there is a small brown coffee table in front of me with magazines. The magazines have celebrities and style on their covers. One has Halsey on the cover and another has Halle Berry and the fashion one has an unknown face. That is the only part that interests me.
The man behind the counter walks up to me and escorts me to a second room where there is tables and chairs about, as if it is a lunch break room. There are large water containers everywhere with many crystals in them. The crystals are shaped like marbles but, I am sure they are high quality for their clarity. The jugs are square and they have a handle to lift for water cups.
When the man says that the doctor is ready for me, I enter the next room. I sit on a cot that is by a window, where plastic blinds are drawn but, I can still see outside. There is an apple tree and birds singing and a stream behind this. It is quite beautiful.
He comes in the room and I become filled with fear. He is all red and giant, with dark brown bone horns, protruding from the sides of his face. He has human characteristics but, it's clear that he is a beast. Before I can think, he is injecting me with a fluid that resembles blood in an IV. He pats me on the shoulder, as if to comfort me because I am speechless.
I am falling asleep now because of the fluid he gave me and he puts a pale blue hospital blanket over me and kisses me on the forehead. I can sense the sun going down through the blinds and as it becomes darker, I fall into the darkness of my sleep. It is peaceful yet horrifying at the same time.
As the day closes and comes again, I wake up slowly as the birds are chirping and the room is starting to light up. Suddenly, I am on the floor and I notice that it is in a bedroom. The red creature is lying down next to me on my left side. As my eyes open, so do his brown animal ones and I tell him I know his name is Satan but, that he is nothing but a red imp to me. He gets up slowly and starts messing around with medicine bottles on a counter nearby.
I get up too and try to leave but, all the doors are locked. I come and ask him if he can let me go and he sets me on the cot in the doctor's room and begins giving me a clear liquid through the IV. He says I am dehydrated now. I am sick and I shouldn’t leave he says.
I sit there and let the fluids rush through me and I feel a cooling sensation, as it flows through my body with pleasure. He is continuing to clean up all the medical supplies off of the tables and checks on the IV monitor, every so often. When it is done, he silently removes it.
There is lavender all over the floor and I go to collect it. He gets upset when he sees me trying to put it in a flower vase and I ask why. He said that he hates that smell and so I remove them from his sights, fearing for the anger that may surface.
I begin to worry about the cheerleading tryouts and he can tell so he gets visibly upset. He said he has to go somewhere and that I can't leave this place. After he goes, I get up to try and depart but, the man behind the counter won't let me. I really want to go to the tryouts so I make a plan to go.
I distract him all day by draining his energy with weird stories and antics. I deplete him by annoying him. There is a human size teddy bear on the chair, so I pretend I am the bear and stand behind it and start talking and dancing and he is busy doing paperwork and cant notice me. I slowly back away but, keep the bear close in front of a fan, so it looks as though he’s moving.
I can go out the door, because he left it open to have his smoke break. I run away easily and I go to the gym and the tryouts are happening again. There we all are and now I am wearing a performing outfit of a black bra with fishnet material over it and a black cheerleading skirt. The girls come up to me as we all made the team together and we celebrate. We get in a black jeep with the top down and we ride away on the freeway laughing and listening to pop music. The sun sets behind us.
I am in a public bathroom stall that is painted brown. The walls are made of cement and are gray. The floor is a powder blue tile. I leave the stall and I go towards the large mirror where I wash my hands and then to my surprise Khloe Kardashian walks into the bathroom.
She is wearing a brown leather coat and her hair is in soft waves. It is dark brown with honey blonde coloring a few inches deep at the tips and around the face. She is wearing large gold hoop earrings and carrying an embellished gold chain and brown purse. It is a quilted bag with a cross body strap. It is small, about the size of a smart phone.
I see her and for some reason I get really excited and start jumping up and down. I make a noise each time I land on the ground, which sounds like fabric whipping around in the sky, like a sail on a boat. She looks at me and grabs me softly and says I better go outside so that I don't fly away. So, I leave and do this.
Outside, it is just turning night and she follows behind me. She tells me to walk up towards a cabin. We are crossing a luscious grass field that is more blue than green. It feels damp and moist. I look down and I am wearing black ankle faux leather boots. They lace us with strings all the way up my shin. I am wearing an all-black blouse and pleated skirt.
We start walking up a hill and I can see the moon and the starlight over a cabin at the top. There is a stream to my left side, which we walk by. It sounds tranquil and calming. I can hear and see many people in the distance, laughing, talking and having a good time.
We get to a group of about 100 people and she tells them that I can fly. She says for them to look at me. When they look at me, I begin to jump up and down and gradually I go higher each time until I am flapping my arms so fast that I actually do fly a little bit. It is shocking and mesmerizing.
Even after all the people leave the get together at the end of the night, I am still jumping in the air extremely high and continuing to practice this ability. I am even going so far as to jump next to the moon and stars and the sights are incredible. There are colorful clouds, shooting stars and a beautiful Earth tune, which sounds angelic and heavenly like a soft water on metal noise.
I am with my husband and we are outside in a garden. The garden has gravestones in it but, may roses and greenery. It is sunny and hot. There is a gazebo that is painted all white in the center of the cemetery.
We are in the gazebo and we notice an electric guitar. The guitar is beautiful. It is made of a hard and clear material which is entirely see through. Inside is clear water which flows in a cycle from the sound hole, through the fret boards and changing back directions at the tip, which is pointed like that of an arrow.
I am amazed and I grab it so that I can start playing songs on it. It is already hooked up to a metal speaker, which is a glowing a green light. The speaker is already on because for a moment I lean to close to it and it makes a high pitch screech.
I put the guitar strap, which is white with red roses on it, over my shoulders and begin to play a melody. It is my music that I am playing. It feels peaceful and enchanting. I am in a white dress as well, so it sets a heavenly vision.
Paul tries to grab the instrument from me and I pull back slightly. I just keep playing music and enjoying the sunlight. As soon as I am done, he goes for it again and breaks the tip of it, where the water turns directions.
I am living in a house by a small stream. The stream goes right by the sides of the structure, which is painted a brightened light blue. When I cross the small wooden bridge to go to my front door, I notice a baby alligator.
He is sweet and beautiful. He is small and swims right to me and looks up at me with big beautiful baby eyes. It melts my heart. He climbs onto the bridge and me, as if he needs to be loved. So, I grab him up in my arms and bring him into the house.
He is so adorable and gets along with my two dogs, a Pekingese and Corky hybrid. He wants me to be his mother, so I name him Alexander and promise to care for his needs. He follows me everywhere in the house, like he is a dog as well. He becomes very large and obese because I over feed him for fear that he might eat the dogs.
At night, he sleeps in a big blue container filled with water. He is always looking at me and he does whatever I want to do. He has a sweet and precious soul and a docile nature. He has love in his eyes and I can feel it throughout the dream.
The first part of my dream I am playing a gorgeous song on a pine wood piano. I am sitting in a sheer silver gown and it is flowy and romantic. It has a silk bodice and the rest is a lacey fabric. It cuts off just above my knees and lays nicely upon the piano bench.
I focus on the keys that I am playing and the first note is a G. The rest of the keys are in harmony and I play them to compliment this key. It is a melody that interlaces and is very enchanting. It is mellow and magical.
Some of the lyrics that I am singing are," I am strong when you come to me" and "I am weak when you leave." It is a beautiful poem that I am still writing because that is my favorite part of music. It is so gorgeous that it remains strong in my brain, upon awakening.
When I get up from the piano I put on black and white athletic clothes and I am waiting in line, in a dimly lit room. It is filled with other people that want to have a job. It reminds me of a gig I had at Scream Park, a haunted house experience because they are all auditioning too.
I leave the building and there is a large green field for soccer. I am at first with one team and then the coach, who has dark hair and light skin, instructs me to play for the other team. So, I run all the way across the long field to join them.
When I get to the other side there is a woman with short blonde hair that keeps saying cruel things to me. She insults me once, after I missed a kick and the second time when I accidently grab the ball with my hands. She misses some shots to so, I don't understand why she is picking on me.
This is where my dream ends is within this game and there is no winner or loser because it is an ongoing situation. I can recall running around the field with a free spirit and feeling alone and not like I should feel being part of a team. I did enjoy myself though.
There is a man that is dressed in jeans and a dark blue hoodie. He has deep brown skin and speaks a separate language that I don't understand. He is walking about a place that has green rolling hills and a lot of sky.
His wife is an older woman with long brown hair and she is crying and speaking in English that her husband keeps having affairs on her. She is very sad and desperate. I leave her outside of a straw hut, where there is smoke coming through the roof, as if a small cooking fire is on. She holds her head in her hands and cries.
I walk back over the hills and see the man again. He starts speaking another fast language and he is filled with anger. The more he talked, the angrier he would become.
I just stand there, in the hillside, as he starts to calm himself down and then he reaches out his arms and tries to grab me to make a sexual advancement towards me. I slap his hand away in offense. I am utterly appalled.
As soon as I swipe his hand away, he gets the point but then loses interest in communicating with me and we keep walking until we come among another small village in the mud and grass, with straw huts, with pointed tops and a huge fire pit in the center of the small village.
He speaks with a woman with long black hair and flirts with her. I am shocked when I look at him now, as his face is burned and inhuman looking. He has long pointed ears and slimy skin. Obviously no one else can notice this, or they would be shocked. He peers at me and his eyes are black. It's like a glitch and it goes back and forth between his two faces.
I am wandering through a library, which has fluorescent lighting and low carpeted blue and brown carpeting. The shelves are low and wide upon the ground and there is a very peaceful vibe in the air, as the people lie about silently on the floors and do not speak because they are so entranced into their reading.
I sit down at a shelf, which oddly reminds me of the bookshelves from the library of my elementary school and pull out occult books to look at. One that catches my eyes is a book on tarot cards. It is a large silver book with many pictures. The pages are white and glossy.
As I put the book back, I come to realize that there are boxes of tarot cards in the same shelf. So, I pull out a white and silver box and also a green and gold one. The green and gold one looks like there are Celtic writings upon it and the silver and white one looks like there is intergalactic and winter scenes on the art.
I put the boxes in my book bag, which is a cream bag with a Macy's logo of a red star on it and I go out the front door, which is right in front of the main librarians desk and she seems to be busy. She has brown hair and thick black glasses. I never check out the cards because I just leave with them as I am in a thoughtless trance of naivety.
I am in my bedroom in my house and I am going through a shelf of a similar size when I notice the cards. Obviously, a long period of time has passed because I start to get extreme anxiety seeing these items. My stomach turns as I wonder about how much money I might owe to the library or if I had accidently stole them!
It is very dark outside and there is a breeze from the chilly fall wind. I can see my dad hunched into my parked car from Deer Lodge, Montana. It is sitting outside of a green wooden fence with natural logs as a barrier. It is a car that he bought me and it had automotive problems.
He is wearing a red puffy coat just like the same color as the Buick. He is basically removing the entire inside of the vehicle and stripping it bare. I can see him but I am not there physically in the same place. I am watching in spirit from the passenger seat.
He has removed everything electronic and taken out all motorized parts. All that is left is the structure of the car, with velvet seats and a black carpeted floor. He is very into what he is doing. The plastic dashboard does not even contain a glove box or other secret compartment. It is all laid out in simplicity and truth.
It is a dark and stormy night and I am sitting on top of a dark brown wooden ship. There are many stars high above me that I am admiring. The weather is clear and a bit misty from rain but, it is a peaceful atmosphere which I am in.
I put my face high into the air and I can feel a soft breeze gently moving through my brown hair. It touches me lightly upon the cheek and swirls into the heavens in a spiral of stardust. I move my face up into the sky as the ocean waves shake and stir beneath me. The moisture touches my lips and I feel serene.
I open my eyes wide as I walk beneath a lantern, set upon a steep uprising, in the center of the ship. It rests upon a black material, which is also luminescent. It grows into a long wooden pole, with ropes swirling and spiraling up. There is a soft yellow glow upon me and I see a sparkle reflecting off the metal.
I realize that there is a slight weight upon my head and I reach up to touch a cold and metal head tiara, which lays out subtly in gold over my ears in small waves, into a crown on my face and a starred jewel upon my third eye. The jewel is a diamond and it feels like ice upon my forehead.
I look back over my right shoulder to peer at the moon. It seems full as it looms even closer than I thought was possible and an orange light melts from its center. I feel the star grow colder and I gather a dark blue caped robe dress from my ankles and lift it, to step down onto stairs and reach the lower floors.
There is a church and it has two rows. One seating area resides upstairs and one that is downstairs. The upstairs resembles a protruding circular shaped balcony, like that in a theatre. It is white marbled and holds red velvet chairs. There are skylights on the roof and windows in complimentary designs throughout.
The downstairs is where I am situated at the stage. The stage is a circular cream colored shape as well, extending from the front of the building. The organ sits outside of the stage but facing the audience. It is magnificent.
The organ is polished black that shines tremendously in the light from the glaring lamps overhead. They appear to be vintage, like that used on an old film set in the forties. It has an angular and simple design, holding up one large light in each corner.
I am sitting at the instrument, on a black polished piano bench, playing a song that is very similar to Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven. I play the chords on the bottom and the top row is reserved for the high notes, solos and melody. It feels divine pouring from me. The organ is playing a piano sound.
It is a beautiful feeling and there is a lot of finely dressed people in the audience. They are in modern clothes of an elegant style featuring shiny metallic dresses, necklaces and velvet suited husbands. They wear large hats with feathers and other baubles to add style and personality. They smile to themselves in contentment.
It appears that I am at my daycare from my youth in Penryn, California. I am the age of a teenager though, not of a child. I have a giant quilted purse bag underneath my arm and I have a blue bow in my hair.
There is a man with light brown hair that is looking in the grass with me for the eggs. He wears blue jeans, tan boots and a grey sweatshirt. He says that he had already searched in the house, behind a couch and was sure we would find something here.
There is pine trees encircling the whole lawn and so the sunlight hardly creeps in. This leaves a damp feeling on my skin and it is hard to see. Although it is day time, it is almost as dark as the night.
Finally, I stumble upon a giant eggshell, behind a tree, in the dirt, which appears to be real. It is dark blue and large, a bit bigger than the size of my hands. I break it open and there are large wads of cash inside, which I never take out of the egg, I just hold it close to myself in gratitude.
I am in my backyard, under the pines and I notice that there is a huge pile of dried leaves and grasses. All of a sudden, the mound begins to shake and stir and it takes away my breath. I see moist soil crumbling and something digging its way out with tiny brown hands.
A tiny brown monkey makes his way from the debris. He is small, about the size of a Chihuahua dog. He is blind in the left eye because it has a white film over it, so that he cannot see properly. I become afraid and open the glass doors from outside and close them on the inside, to peer at this creature safely.
He seems disappointed, as a familiar look of human sadness overwhelms his face and overcomes him. I am not sure how I know but I think his energy is masculine. I feel my heart sinking in a compassionate feeling and so I make my way back outside to greet him.
He is very nice and cuddles me in a hug. He points to his mound and the container of water nearby and also the trees and greenery in the backyard. He seems to be very excited at this point! I have an overwhelming urge to bring him inside but Paul stops me by the doors.
He tells me he thinks that he knows the people that left the monkey and they are rich and they told his department at Fish and Wildlife that he bites. He bit someone three times, he retells me. So, then I put the monkey back down to go back and follow his advice. I still peer at the monkey and let it live there anyway.
There is a small house with white carpet, which is creamy and dusty from age. The rooms are small and comfy. There is a tan leather couch in the living room, which Paul is sitting on with another man, who has black hair, light skin and wears transparent black glasses. We are all in all black clothing.
The man has a backpack on and Paul and he have boxes of stuff, which they are going through and pulling all over the room. There are files, sweaters and random electronic devices, which appear to be like iPods and musical players of this time.
I go into the hallway to reach up into the attic. The windows have dirty coffee colored blinds and there are no sounds. I pull down the ladder and go to the destination. I feel an overwhelming desire to look through everything for clues.
I walk up the steps and there is a small room with mirrors, music and newspapers. After reading a few headlines, it is obvious that there was some kind of war here. To me, the language used is English. It is obvious that this is another place that is not America that I know.
I pick up a hand held mirror, which surpasses the era of the other objects by many years. It begins to glitch in my hand and when I turn it around, I notice that the black backside has solar power and a clear protective case. There are markings in silver of another language, weird symbols that I cannot translate and when the light hits them just right, they are luminescent and change not only color but shape as well.
I must have knocked something to the right position because suddenly the mirror turns on and displays a Germanic looking language. There are videos saved on what looks like a desktop computer with a black background of a happy family with fair hair and light eyes. There is a mother and father and two sons. They wear light blue clothing that appears to be many years old, perhaps the eighties. They wear largely collared shirts and the woman has a light pink retro dress on like they did in the fifties but it is modernized with dots and emerald jewelry.
That's when I begin to notice that there is also toys spread out all over the attic. There is a white rocking horse, radio cars and a battery powered airplane. Finally, the sun starts to set and I can see this through the window, which peaks out perfectly from the pointed roof. The landscape is an empty hillside with dried up grass and palm trees.
I collect all the important looking stuff, such as musical devices and also the mirror. I put everything into a black backpack that I have, which has red and orange stripes on both sides. From here, I go back down from the attic to show the other people what I have and to see what they have found. It seems like there is no one around for a long and wide area of time. It is eerie and mysterious.
My soul is soaring through blue skies and it is a joyful feeling. As I am going, I notice all the clouds in the air, there is some that are large, some that are small and some that sparkle. They are varying shades of white, gray and black shadow and ice.
When I see a cloud sparkle, I do my best to stop to watch it, before it floats away. This is because when the sunlight hits it, a rainbow comes out of it. It is exciting to watch and it makes me passionate about the beauty!
Then, I fly back down to Earth and I am in a church singing. I go from singing at the front, to the very back of the room. This place is just past the wooden church pews, on a dark forest green carpet and into a white stone walled kitchen, where I can barely see the words to the song of Jesus.
Someone starts speaking from behind me and says that I shouldn’t sing so proud because I am only a background singer. It stuns me for a few minutes, as I contemplate what is being said! I keep hearing the voice over and over in my head saying that I am just a background singer.
Then, I notice a lady with short cut hair, like a boys and it is rainbow colors. She smiles at me and so I follow her into a bedroom. She has on black glasses and she is sitting on a twin bed with black covers and white sheets. She is looking through a photo book and she motions for me to come discover what she is looking at.
The pictures in her hands are Polaroid’s and she takes more from a shoe box, as she hands them to me in piles of threes, fours and fives. The pictures are of clouds and rainbows. I look across from where I am sitting and see many more shoeboxes in an open closet, which has sliding mirror doors.